Good Clean Fun
by harllett
Summary: [Miracle] Twenty-odd hockey players, the shower room, and a bar of soap... [One-shot]


**Disclaimer** : I don't own anything in this fic. Unfortunately. I want to own naked hockey players :(

**Summary** : Twenty-odd hockey players, a shower room, and a bar of soap…

**Rating** : T (is anyone else totally confused by the new rating system?)

**Author's Note** : This fic was spawned from an incident I mentioned in my other one shot, "Object of my Affection." I kinda wanted to explain it….figured it would be fun to write!

Just wanted to say thanks to Klinoa for letting me keep bitchy Johnson in this…when I wrote it he turned out all cranky, he has a mind of his own when it comes to one-shots! "I WILL be written this way…" anyway, if you haven't already, go check out her one shots.

**XX**

**XX**

"I can't feel my legs," Jack O'Callahan complained as he collapsed on a bench in the dressing room.

"Quit whining OC," Dave Silk told him.

"Yeah OC, ya big girl," John 'Bah' Harrington teased.

"I need water," Mark Johnson gasped, grabbing a bottle and taking a huge swig.

"And I need a shower," Jimmy Craig told them, in his deep Boston drawl. Taking his hockey kit off in record time, he wrapped a towel around his waist, grabbed a bottle of shampoo from his kit bag, and headed for the shower room.

The shower room is a place that exists in throes of mystery surrounding the game of hockey. It is where hockey players long to be during a gruelling training session, and where female fans long to have a peephole. In reality, it isn't that exciting – a regular square, tiled room off the dressing room, with shower heads at intervals along the walls. The mystery about it is the way twenty young men shower in that room together. Naked.

Of course, it is often awkward to begin with. When new teams are formed, players often spend the first few days showering in shorts. But before long, they don't care, and routinely traipse together into the shower room in nothing but their skin.

As far as the 1980 Olympic hockey team was concerned, the shower room was never that much of an issue. For example, from the first day, OC stripped naked in the middle of the dressing room and made his way unashamedly to the room. Of course, shower room jokes always emerge, and poor Buzz Schneider had become the butt of them – due to his height, of course.

"I want a shower, but I can't move." OC had sprawled himself across a bench, his eyes closed.

"Do you think it's kinda weird how we all have to shower together?" Bah pondered.

"Ugh, not another of Bah's insight-into-the-world conversations," Johnson groaned. "I'm too tired for this."

"I'm serious," Bah persisted. "Around twenty guys, all naked, in a room? Don't you think it's pretty strange?"

"I think this conversation is strange," Johnson muttered.

"Actually, I find it a turn on," Mac said with a roll of his eyes.

"Really?"

"No!" Mac threw a roll of stick tape at Bah.

"C'mon Bah, d'you really think he'd be here if he was gay?" Mike Ramsey asked. "He'd be in the Navy." His comment was met with sniggers around the room.

"What?" Bah asked, bemused, his look of boyish innocence and confusion sending the other guys into peals of laughter.

"Forget it, Bah," Johnson told him. "In fact, why are we having this conversation? Why don't we just go shower?"

"I'm scared Mac might jump on me," Silk said with a grin.

"D'you really think that if I was gay – which I'm not, by the way – I'd choose you, Silky?"

"That was harsh," Silk sulked, grabbing his shower gel and heading for the shower.

"Aww, Mac, you hurt his feelings," OC mocked. "Hey, Silky! Mac's coming in a minute, keep your soap on a rope!"

The guys cracked up laughing, especially when Silk shot a glare at OC over his shoulder.

"What?" Bah asked again, his innocence serving only to further the laughter.

"Forget it Bah," Buzz chuckled, following Silk to the shower room.

"All I want to know is, don't you guys find it odd showering with the rest of us?"

"I just try not to think about it," Rammer replied. "Or at least, I try not to look."

"Yeah, don't want to see something you shouldn't," Bah agreed.

"Does anyone else find this conversation entirely pointless?" Johnson asked. He was ignored.

"Don't look at Mac, you'll be scarred for life," OC proclaimed.

"What, you mean you have?" Mac replied with a look of mock fright.

"Oh, forget it," Johnson growled, storming off in the direction of the shower room. Gradually, the rest of the guys followed.

Rizzo was last in, stepping under a spare showerhead and pressing the button that released deliciously hot water over his aching body. Closing his eyes, he let it flow over himself for a while, then started to soap up.

Eventually, he became aware of a series of chuckles going round the room. Opening one eye, he found the boys all staring at him with smirks.

"Hey, Rizzo, what's with the soap?" OC asked, trying not to laugh. Rizzo looked down. Where the other guys had bottles of shop-bought shower gel and shampoo, Rizzo was holding a large bar of lathery soap.

"My mom sent it," he replied defensively. "She made it."

"Your mom makes soap?" OC hooted. "Let me see."

"No," Rizzo replied. "You'll just throw it out the window or something."

"Can I try it, Rizzo?" Rammer asked innocently.

"Sure, Rammer," Rizzo replied, passing it over. Shooting an apologetic look at Rizzo, Rammer tossed it over to OC.

"Yes!" OC whooped. "Thanks Rammer." He lifted the soap and took a sniff, then wrinkled his nose. "Is this why you smell so bad Rizzo?"

"Come on OC, leave him alone," Silk said. Rizzo looked at him gratefully. "We all know it's the meatballs that make him stink."

Rizzo glared at Silk, then back at Rammer. "Fine, if you're going to ridicule me…" he started to walk away.

"See, this is weird," Bah announced. "We're all standing around talking about soap, and no-one seems to care that everyone else is naked."

Johnson let out a shriek of frustration and covered his ears.

"I care that you're naked, Bah," Mac replied. "I could quite happily live the rest of my life without ever seeing the sight of you naked again."

Johnson started to sing, painfully out of tune.

"Stop singing, Johnson!" Silk told him. He didn't hear.

"Johnson, QUIT SINGING!" OC bellowed. Johnson uncovered his ears and shot OC a withering glare.

"I'll stop singing when he –" he gestured towards Bah "- stops starting these STUPID conversations about pointless crap."

With Johnson's anger distracting the guys, Rizzo had taken his chance and sneaked up behind OC. As he reached for the soap, OC noticed him, and wrenched it out of his reach. "Come and get it," he taunted, then tossed the soap to Rammer.

As Rizzo headed towards Rammer, Rammer passed it back to OC, who tossed it on to Mac. It went from Mac to Silk, from Silk to Pav, from Pav to Buzz, and from Buzz to Jimmy. Buzz's pass was short, and the soap fell to the floor. Rizzo lunged for it, OC jumping forward to stop him.

His foot landing on the soap, OC skidded forward, hitting Jimmy and sending the two of them flying. Jimmy hit the floor with a crash, OC landing on top of him. OC had caught Rizzo on the way down and he landed next to them. They slid on the slippery floor, crashing into Johnson, who grabbed Silk for support and ended up dragging him down with him.

Bah surveyed the heap of five naked hockey players, who were lying stunned on the cold, wet floor of the shower room. "See, this – this is _weird_!" he implored.

"Would one of you boys care to tell me what the hell is going on here?"

Herb was standing in the entrance, hands on hips, looking at the pile of hockey players with an expression that was part anger, part confusion, and part amusement.

Rizzo cleared his throat and held up the bar of soap, which he'd finally regained control of. "We were just having some good, clean fun," he told him innocently.

Herb shook his head and walked out, as the rest of the boys cracked up laughing.


End file.
